I'd love to say looking back on 2008, I have grown and strengthened my relationship with God, but in reality that's unfortunately not the case. I am truly and unmistakably thankful for each and every experience God gave me this yr. I truly am. However, it seems that after Hannah's death I pushed Him away. There were awesome times when I would be reminded of his love, and I would feel it, but then would continue on my way in total apathy. This lifestyle that I chose does not make sense has not left me spiritually healthy. It's like I went spiritually anorexic. Enjoying God when I wanted to, but then pushing Him away the rest of the time. I don't want this to be the pattern I set for myself. I want to be a spiritual fattie. Kind of a wierd analogy, but I guess it works.. haha.
This next year, (once I get back to school) my roomates and I are going to start at the beginning and read the Bible all the way through, and we'll finish it by New Yrs. 2010. I'm really excited to start this with my friends, and am truly thankful for God giving me some awesome friends to keep me accountable. It's my prayer that as I read and study His word that he will give me wisdom, and that I will seek Him with all of my heart; therefore bringing me closer to Him.
Also, I plan on participating in the homeless ministry that some students at Harding have founded. I've been once, and it was simply a humbling experience that I will never forget. I want to go as many weekends this year as I can, and do what I can to serve those in need in Little Rock.
I have also made the decision to blog here as often as possible. I think it will be good to type out my day to day (or perhaps week to week ;) ) progress, so that I will have some tangible way to look back on my journey with God and see how much He not only blesses my life, but how He continues to help me grow.
So.. all in all, I am thankful for this yr. I don't deserve tomorrow, yet in this yr alone God gave me 365 of them. He is good, yeah? Yeah. :)
Please pray for my walk. Discipline. Wisdom. Self control. etc. ;)
I know things are going to be just fine.
Blessed Be Your Name
by Matt Redman
"Blessed Be Your Name
In the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name
Blessed Be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed Be Your name
Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name
Blessed be Your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's 'all as it should be'
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name
Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name
You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name"
Be blessed.
Grace and peace.
<3
love, Lauren..*
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